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Hawaii Five-0 – It’s a jungle out there

On this week's 'Hawaii Five-0,' Steve and Chin take to the jungle while Danny breaks all of our hearts. Was any of it realistic? No. But did anyone really care?

- Season 1, Episode 16 - "E Malama"

There are many things people can and should take seriously in life. Things like, say, having a stroke, or the child literacy rates in third world countries. Things people should not take seriously are cop shows. They are highly unrealistic. If they were actually realistic, there would be a lot more episodes wasted on false alarms and the highly popular past time of urination on public property which, if my town’s paper is to be believed, covers about 90% of all crimes cops actually deal with. But as far as I can tell, that is not exactly the point of Hawaii Five-0 or, in fact, almost any cop show. It’s to entertain and fulfill all of our deeply-seated needs to see bad guys beaten up and taken down.

So to preempt the peanut gallery of Statler and Waldorfs that seem to take some deep enjoyment in simply lying in wait for posts to go up so they can vent frustrations, let me take a moment to explicitly agree with you on this point — this episode was unrealistic as all hell. If you want to see realism in a cop show, I suggest you break out your DVDs of The Wire, because this show will never fill that need. If, however, you would like to see amusing and endearing people solving crime in stupidly gorgeous locations, congrats! Have we got a show for you.

Also, if you’re a fan of realism, you probably really, really disliked this episode and should stop reading now, because I loved it.

I mean yes, Steve McGarrett is a patently ridiculous character. He’s Rambo. He’s the human incarnation of a GI Joe doll. Who the hell has camo gear, walkie-talkies, and a giant knife in the trunk of their car? Steve McGarrett does! Who can tell from a broken leaf where to find a suspect? Steve McGarrett can! Who randomly skips around the Hawaiian wilderness with unnecessary face paint on, rigs up a giant log trap (while counseling his partner on how to deal with his feelings) and then re-inflates a lung using a little twig? Steve McGarrett! And it’s not even out of character. I mean this is the guy who within the first episode drove a car onto a moving cargo ship and since then has dunked people in shark tanks, brought a dictator back to his house and half-destroyed it with Molotov cocktails him made in his garage, and drives motorcycles up a flight of stairs just because it’s a day that ends in a -y and he can.

The funny thing is, though, while even I would admit that Steve went above and beyond his normal level of ridiculous, honestly, the show has primed me that I didn’t even find it that weird or out of character, I just found it kind of endearing. I think the only reason I noticed it, really, is because Danny wasn’t behind him bitching incredulously every step of the way. It hit me this episode that Danny and Steve work together for more reasons than simply their old married couple chemistry — Danny provides the anchor to realism when Steve is going off into his crazy place. Sure, Chin made a snarky little comment, but somehow it just wasn’t the same. The fact of the matter is, Steve suffers, as a character, when he doesn’t have Danny to relate to.

But for every other character, though, this week was spot-on. Kono was fierce beyond my wildest dreams (and I dare anyone to say she’s not a pro-feminist character now). Chin was amazing, competent, and, let’s not lie, more than a little of dreamy. Like, enough to make me want to get lost in the Hawaiian jungle just so he could rescue me. The victim of the week was amazing. She was both sympathetic and vulnerable without being weak or weepy. She was strong, but not competent, which made her believable and made you root for her in the space of about five seconds.

And then … there was Danny. Oh, Danny.

I will repeat until kingdom come my belief that Scott Caan was utterly robbed at the Golden Globes this year, not because I don’t like Chris Colfer or think he did a bad job — but for episodes like this. It is physically impossible, if you have a heart, to come out of this episode not being deeply, desperately in love with Danny’s character. He is mean and angry and desperate and broken, and you love him. How can you not? How can you not root for him when you see how deeply he loves his daughter or is desperate to do right by his ex-wife no matter how badly she’s hurt him? How could anyone in the entire world have not watched him take on that housing commissioner like he was this close to just shaking apart at the seams with rage and frustration, and then found themselves inexplicably cheering police brutality? That’s the magic of Danny Williams — he can stand on his own, completely apart from the team, like he did in this episode, and you almost find yourself caring more about him than the other three people who are supposed to be the main plot, and when he is part of the team, he automatically elevates every single character to becoming more than they are — most especially, with Steve. And, maybe, he makes the entire premise of improbably pretty people magically taking down bad guys and still having their hair look fabulous, and makes it just that much more bizarrely believable.

Photo Credit: CBS

6 Responses to “Hawaii Five-0 – It’s a jungle out there”

February 14, 2011 at 4:29 PM

I’m totally disagree with your opinions,you are totally partisan for Scott Caan,that is bad actor, ugly and small,looks like a grumpy dwarf.The writers have focused more on his character,so it seems better,instead of focusing on the character of everyone equally,and especially that of Steve,that is the true protagonist of the show.Of all the characters that I dislike is that of Danny,and I’m delighted that Scott not has won the Golden Globe,does not deserve it at all.
And listen producers of Hawaii 5.0,we want more of Steve and less of Danno.We are fed up with his daughter and his wife,want to return Steve’s sister Victor Hesse and Wo Fat.Back to the original idea of the project.

February 14, 2011 at 8:59 PM

Ooh, Sandy, take a chill pill. I’m totally disagree with your opinions.

I too look forward to the return of Wo Fat. I want to know how that 10 million bucks magically reappeared. I like it when things blow up and bad guys (or girls) get taken down with the boom of a sailboat.

But that’s not why I’m still in front of my t.v. every Monday night. I keep coming back to see what the writers and actors do with the characters. So far, Danny is the heart and soul of the show, and it’s his interaction with the others that fully humanizes them. That’s slowly evolving as the others get more backstory, but I believe Danny will always be the lynchpin of this series. Steve may be the action hero, but Danny is its humanity.

And only an actor of the highest caliber can carry that off.

February 17, 2011 at 10:24 AM

Just some observations, Steve Mcgarrett is smart enough to lead their own team, elite, it is fun and has shown “great compassion”, and also is proven dedication to his family. And Alex O´Loughlin, acrobatics in Hawaii Five-0 are impressive, something that many people don’t know about, has had a lot of training, has made more than ten years of martial arts, it has its certificate of master of the fight. The study does not allow you make more scenes of danger it not hurt, trained is, the boy makes a lot of hard work. Mcgarrett is without doubt the heavy weight of the series.

February 15, 2011 at 2:08 PM

Honestly I think Danny Williams character is over-reactive and manipulative, obviously the writers are focusing more on Danny’s role than on the parts played by the other actors, Steve is supposed to be the leader of the show. I really think that Alex O’Loughlin is not getting a fair treatment.

I too look forward to the return of Wo Fat and the investigation of Mcgarrett family murders, I find it more interesting than the case of week.

February 16, 2011 at 8:36 AM

In my opinion Julia Hass and Trish, should be the presidents of the fans’ club of Scott Caan, because only they praise disproportionately the “qualities” of this actor and his character, criticizing negatively, even ridiculing the others actors and characters of the series, without thinking that it is the set of everything and everyone, what they do of Hawaii Five-0 one of the best series of the season.

From the first episode is obvious that Steve McGarrett is the hero of the team, the main character, and the mystery surrounding the murder of his father and the discovery after that his mother was also killed, it turns in the main plot of the series.

The rest of the team are the complement to the main character, especially Danno, he’s the perfect reply to Steve, represents the normal cop, with family problems, front of the prestigious former Navy Seal who is suddenly leading a special investigation team formed by cops and that have to live again in the island where he lived many years ago. Out of the Navy, Steve is like a fish out of water, but they all complement each other, it would be pointless the character of Danno without Steve.

For all the above, I am not at all agree with the views of you two and I think is offensive to describe Steve McGarrett, as “ridiculous” “Rambo” or “Gi Joe”, I’m not going to put your personal low level, but if I want to say a few things:

1 – I think that Alex O’Loughlin is a clearly better actor than Scott Caan in every way, it would be perfectly capable of interpreting the character of Danno, while on the contrary, I can’t imagine to Scott playing the action scenes of Steve, if anyone deserved the nomination for Golden Globes, this was Alex.
2 – The Alex’s physical appearance is awesome, I’m sorry for Scott, but Alex is infinitely more attractive, handsome and sexy, you just have to compare their bodies.
3 – Alex has earned with his own effort to be the main protagonist of this and other television series and films in which it has demonstrated its many facets as a great actor, however I think if Scott was not the son of James Caan would not be where it is, be “daddy’s boy” bears also a capricious and fickle character that is already causing problems for production.
4 – The real success of the series is in the hard work of all actors, in the well-crafted scripts and in a production that spares no means, is the blend of action, friendship, family values and good humor. Success is of the entire team, Scott does not do anything special.
5 – If there’s something really ridiculous in Hawaii Five-0 is to have someone like Danno, who does not value living in a paradise like Hawaii, which is growling all the time, for everything and in a bad mood, but above all his hair that will not budge for anything, for much wind, or action scenes that he does.
You all don’t believe which this we already saw it in the original series and that it is passé?
I apologize for such a long comment.

February 17, 2011 at 10:33 AM

Better and clearer Marisa cannot be said, without Mcgarrett, among other things, the series would not be so successful and more prepared actor to play the “protagonist”, undoubtedly Alex O´Loughlin.

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