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South Park – Love is like taking a dump

Cupid Cartman, a 'Game of Thrones' history lesson, gay love and Cupid Cartman. It's the last South Park until some time later this year, and we've got a bunch of choice quotes from it for you.

- Season 16, Episode 7 - "Cartman Finds Love"

“… And so what we start to see now is a pattern in world history much like the Greeks and the Romans. Remember that there were seven families fighting for control over the land of Westeros. The king of Westeros was who? Robert Baratheon. And he asked Eddard, also known as of course Lord Stark, to serve as Hand of the King. You remember that Lord Stark accepted of course the queen’s family — that is the Lanisters — were really trying back then to take control, weren’t they? Where were the Targaryens at this time? Well they were across the sea … we all talked about how they were also trying to take the throne. So we’ve got the Greeks, the Romans, the Starks, Lanisters, Baratheons, Targaryens all heading for a big blow-out right in season two. …” – Mr. Garrison, in history class

“There’s something you should probably know. Oh man, this is hard. Um. The thing is, me and Kyle are kind of, you know, together.” – Cartman
“Ooooh.”
“Yeah. He’s my man. I’m more out than Kyle is, but, it sucks he acts like we’re not a couple at school ‘cuz he’s embarrassed, but … we get home and he’s the best boyfriend I’ve ever had.” – Cartman
“Wow. I’m sorry. I totally respect that. Hey, thanks a lot for telling me.” – Nicole
“Cool. Just , y’know, don’t touch me ‘cuz I’m not into girls so it kinda grosses me out.” – Cartman
“Oh, I’m sorry.” – Nichole
“Yeah cool. Anyway, thanks a lot. And just, you know, stay away from my man, bitch.” – Cartman

“Love is like taking a dump, Butters. Sometimes it works itself out. But sometimes … you gotta give it a nice, hard, slimy push.” – Cartman

“Look … look. What about Lou Covina and Maria Sanchez? Is it a coincidence they ended up together?” – Cartman
“Actually I heard they’re together because they got locked in the gym overnight a few moths ago.” – Stan
“Oh did they? I hadn’t heard about that.” – Cartman
“Tee hee! That was us, remember Eric?” – Cupid Cartman
“Shh! Quiet, Cupid me!” – Cartman
“What?” – Cartman
“Who is Cupid me?” – Kyle
“Nothing.” – Cartman

“So … you guys are totally broken up then? It’s … it’s done?”
“*sigh* Yeah.” – Token
“So then … she’s gonna be seeing other people. She’s sort of available?” – Kyle
“Yeah, we’re through.” – Token
“So, theoretically, if someone was to step in, it would be OK?” – Kyle
“I’m sorry Kyle,  I like girls.” – Token
“Huh? Dude, what the fuck!” – Kyle

Photo Credit: Comedy Central

2 Responses to “South Park – Love is like taking a dump”

May 1, 2012 at 2:30 PM

isn’t it mr garrison that is talking about the History class?

May 1, 2012 at 3:35 PM

Indeed! Fixed.

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