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Modern Family – Quotes and more quotes

Everyone loves quotes from one of our favorite new comedies of the year, 'Modern Family.' So, let's just go through some of the best of the night, shall we?

- Season 1, Episode 20 - "Benched"

“One day I’m going to be a grandfather and then everybody better hide their meat.” – Phil, when Jay takes over the grill from him

“Oh, he owns Earth Gear Apparel. I have their ski pants.” – Cam
“You … you don’t ski.” – Mitchell
“I have cargo pants and I don’t work at the docks.” – Cam

“It’s Cameron’s turn to be out in the world, interacting with other adults. While I get to stay at home and plot the death of Dora the Explorer…. Fill her backpack with bricks and throw her into Candy Cane river.” – Mitchell

“Why do I have to come to these things?” – Alex
“Because you love your brother.” – Claire
“Why don’t you make him go to my orchestra concerts?” – Alex
“Because we love your brother.” – Phil

“Home come you’re not coaching?” – Claire
“Because your dad coached football.” – Phil
“I’m sorry … and I am going to make it up to you tonight….” – Claire
“And I’ll be thinking of your dad when you do.” – Phil
“Hmm … disturbing.” – Claire

“What’s my coaching philosophy? Give a kid a bird, and he becomes one of those weird dudes who walks around with a bird on his shoulder. But give him a pair of wings … and he can fly. Unless he has absolutely no hand-eye coordination.” – Phil

Photo Credit: ABC

2 Responses to “Modern Family – Quotes and more quotes”

April 15, 2010 at 8:33 AM

I believe it was “throw [Dora] into Candy Cane River.”

“$2.95… $2.95… $4.95… $2.95… $3.95… $2.95…” – Mitchell
“40% off… 40% off… 40% off…” – Cameron

“I-I think I can help. You’re not your mom. *beat* Wow, that’s your mom. Oh, I just got chills.” – Phil to Claire

“I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to stand here and feel sorry for myself. You know what we should do?” – Claire
“Get pregnant.” – Gloria
“I was gonna say go for ice cream.” – Claire
“Okay, we do yours first.” – Gloria

July 16, 2010 at 11:08 AM

Phil: He better cool it or I’m going to introduce him to the Captain and Tenille (as he puts his fists out).

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Cam: I’m in a really dark space. Being away from my Lily is literally torture. But I can’t pressure Mitchell. But I really, really… really just want him to get a job, so I can go back to being a stay-at-home dad slash trophy wife.

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Phil: Father-in-laws are tough because you can’t let ‘em push you around and you also have to show them respect. It’s like walking a tightrope. Which, by the way, I can do, because I went to trapeze school. Did Jay? I doubt it.

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Modern Family fan site –> modernfamilyfan.blogspot.com

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