Dancing With the Stars took on classical music for the first time this week, and I liked it. Although, it did seem to confuse a lot of the professionals, who kept insisting that classical music is hard to choreograph because it has no clear beat or rhythm. Um what? Of course it does, you idiots! Haven’t they ever noticed those papers in front of the musicians? Those would be score sheets; containing tempo and little black dots that make up notes to move to. Have they seen any ballets? Seriously. If I heard one more professional say that they choreograph to lyrics, I may have punched someone.
The orchestra was doubled, the music was fab, and that violin guy David Garrett was a tasty bit of distraction, wasn’t he ladies? I loved seeing so many younger people in the orchestra pit. I worry sometimes for the future of classical music. My own city’s orchestra just had to take a 22 percent pay cut and were on strike for six months. I’ve loved classical music forever, and played with my high school orchestra. American classical composers were some of my heroes as a kid, like Leonard Bernstein, George Gershwin, and Aaron Copland. So, long story short, I was happy to see the show incorporate this important genre of music.
Having said that, let’s get to the highlights and lowlights of the celebrities performances. When we are this early in the game, I just can’t go on and on about each person. I mean I could, of course, but we have limited time don’t we? So I’m synopsizing .
Romeo and Chelsie: Uh huh. Romeo is getting better all the time.
Kendra and Louis: She’s “Pasa Doblayed.” Dead in the water. Buh bye. It’s not that she’s really bad, it’s just she’s the weakest one. She shows us nerves and looks like she’d rather be eating sauerkraut and peanut butter than dancing. I don’t blame her. Louis is a pain. She has no emotion when it comes to this. None at all. Back to the pole, sweetie! (Oh, that was mean. Tara’s mean.)
Sugar Ray and Anna: Sugar Ray just bugs me. I can’t “feel” him. Their dance was amusing. It was cute. But he’s on my personal chopping block.
Petra and Dmitri: She’s gorgeous. She can dance, and she seems super nice as a person. Grrrr.
Ralph and Karina: I’m glad Ralph worked on his “creepy fingers” this week. Having creepy fingers is always a liability on this show. And in real life, if you think about it. Ralph is just so nerdy to me though. I want to be on board, but…
Hines and Cheryl: He’s the best of the guys, and the best NFL contestant on the show yet. I love watching him. The only things that bugs me is the look on his face sometimes. Can you say Zombie??
Chelsea and Mark: For the second week in a row, I loved these two! Mark is giving Maks a run for the best and most creative choreographer. Judge Len Goodman needs an enema when he’s critiquing sometimes. I agree that a lot of the routines get too gratuitously sexual, but not in this case. Mark choreographs in a really interesting way. It reminds me of Gene Kelly, in the way he tries (and succeeds) at making the routines modern and so fun to watch. He and Chelsea are going to the end, I think. Or at least I hope so. With these “America votes” shows, anything is possible.
Chris and Cheryl: It’s not Chris’ fault that I’ve always found Cheryl to be like sandpaper on my sensitive parts, is it?
And lastly …
Kirstie and Maks: Oh girlie. I’m on your side. And as long as you keep wiping out or losing your shoe, America will be too. Maybe next week, your boob should pop outta your dress. That’ll keep you in it! Just an idea. Oh. And I have a fantasy that you and Maks’ll get married. Really. You guys are the perfect snarky loving match! (Uh oh. Tara’s mean AND she has a corny side? She’s confusing!)
One final thought. Bruno. Bruno, Bruno, Bruno! I cannot take it seriously when you take off parts of your clothes and run your hands over your body about the women contestants. Frankly, the whole drama stuff is getting a bit annoying. Maybe it’s just me. But I don’t think so. And I don’t have this on good authority or anything, but if you show up dead, I think the police should question Len first thing.
Clacked by Tara Shrodes
on Apr 12, 2011 @ 08:03 EST5EDT
. . . . .
“Kirstie”. It’s “Kirstie”, Carrie Ann, “Kirstie”.
“Kuhr”. “Stee”.
It’s not that freakin’ difficult.
Producers? Please … get Carrie Ann some cheat sheet notes so she not only knows who the contestants are (you know, just in case) and how their names are pronounced …
Didn’t notice that until rewind. Whatta airbubble she is.
Last night was so weird. I’m sick of Kendra lamenting how she’s not a lady yet tries to escape the idea that she’s a bimbo.Oof!
YEA! Cheryl grates me the wrong way, too. Always has. Always will. I like Chris Jerico, though.
Carrie Ann is annoying. A toe comes up off the ground and she gets all berserko. Can she even ball room dance? The only thing I know of her is that she was Fook Yu or Fook Mi in one of the Austin Powers movies.
Team G-Mak cracks me up. I don’t know if it’s a curse or a scam. Either way, neither of the duo seems to worry too much. I do fear that many voters will have had enough if they don’t turn out a dance that isn’t riddled with issues.
Lastly, Brooke Burke is a nin-com-poop.
I’m inventing a Brooke Burke doll. It will be skinny with a head the size of a baseball, and when you pull her string she’ll say “You got a score of 18. How does that feel?”
I so enjoyed the music last night…(my cup of tea)….absolutely loved Katherine Jenkins … loved David Garrett….loved the classics. Due to an important Skype call I missed Kirstie…! Don’t think I have ever watched a professional ballroom competition where the music includes singers.
But note to Kendra…**air head**..why on earth do you instantly think of Andrea Bocelli’s ‘Con Te Partiro’ as being Mafia? **rolling eyes**. Off to the chopping block for you girlie.
*POST AUTHOR*
I saw Andrea Bocelli sing that in concert, and by the end the whole arena was wiping their sleeves over their noses. Incredible!
I missed some of the show, so I missed Kendra “dance”. When I saw her at the end of the show and the very very pissy look on her face…I thought..uh ohhhh..someone must not have done well. Then my next thought was that she looked so very old with that hairstyle..sort of like Joan Crawford’s Mildred Pierce!
I wouldn’t put classical music at the top of my music list but I really enjoyed the music last night. David Garrett was a big part of that!
I liked the classical music theme. It’s nice that everyone is pretty evenly matched this season, there isn’t a front-runner.
I’m sure you’ve all noticed that Kendra has an excuse for everything. I’m tired of it and she can go. I’m also tired of all the dramatics from the judges. Give your opinion without making a big production out of it!
Hey Gurl###
Correction: Hines is with Kym Johnson
Look the title. You are too funny. Regarding Kristie, I thought she looked liked she was imitated Barbra Streisand’s Swan Lake performance from “Funny Girl”. She looked like she was kind of making fun of the dance which turned me off and I have been routing for her. I’m with you on Cheryl. Ugh!
Last night’s show make me say, “Finally good music on this show”
Long story short, Kendra should go. She was bad and annoying last night.
*POST AUTHOR*
You’re right luvie — thanks! My faux pas.
OMG. Can you believe we have to put up with another week of bimbo Kendra? At least, Sugar Ray is gone. Loved seeing Len as “Patton”