The Hobbit comes out on DVD and Blu-ray and pisses me off

hobbit

The home video release of ‘The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey’ arrives this week. If you’re interested in watching a beloved story get both mercilessly hacked to pieces and inflated at the same time, look no further than this gem.

 

Let me start by warning you that this is more of a movie review than a review of the Blu-ray version of the movie. I’ll get to that later in the post, but for now I’ve got some venting to do.

A couple of years ago I introduced my then 6-year-old son to the world of Middle Earth. I’d already read J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit once many years ago, so reading it aloud again for my son was a joy. It was nice to have the story fresh in my head again, with the knowledge that a film version was in the works. For each of the previous Peter Jackson films, I’d made a point of going out and seeing them in the theater, the morning of their release. I didn’t see why The Hobbit was going to be any different. I was pretty damned excited.

Then word came out that Jackson decided The Hobbit was too vast and complex to consist of merely one film. So it was decided that it’d be two films. Alright, I guess a couple of two-hour films could make sense, if he couldn’t fit the whole book into three. I even wrote about my thoughts on where the movies might split. Once that two movies became three movies, my faith in what was going to be included in these films shattered a bit. Was this really being done to include every little detail from that one book, or was it just a means for making more money?

 It’s really mostly crap. And a lot of it.

After watching The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, I’m thinking Peter Jackson didn’t decide to make The Hobbit into three movies for money alone, nor to be 100% faithful to the book, but to tell The Hobbit how he thought it should be told; Tolkien be damned. And maybe I’d be OK with that if what he actually produced was truly better, but it’s really mostly crap. And a lot of it.

Firstly, the movie took me three fucking nights to get through. Yeah, I’m not a spry 20- or even 30-something anymore, but I can stay up with the best of ‘em when I want to. And, for this, I really did want to. The problem for me came in that first hour, where we were introduced to characters we’d barely heard mention of. We learn of Azog, the Pale Orc, who was mentioned in one sentence in The Hobbit; yet, in the movie, he plays a huge, pivotal role. And don’t get on me about supporting stories from The Silmarillion and even The Lord of the Rings — this is The Hobbit we’re talking about, and Azog simply did not appear. At all. Yeah, he’s damn cool, but what the hell’s he doing there? But the worst part of that first hour was that it takes longer than that for Bilbo to even leave The Shire! I was falling asleep!

The worst part of that first hour was that it takes longer than that for Bilbo to even leave The Shire! I was falling asleep!

Where in The Lord of the Rings movies some were upset that Jackson omitted some characters and details, it’s the numerous additions that Jackson made to The Hobbit that are truly bothersome. There’s the aforementioned Azog, and then there’s the completely absurd Radagast the Brown. Like Azog, Radagast is mentioned in one sentence in the book, yet he appears in several key scenes in the movie where he’d never appeared before. And he’s just silly stupid. To add insult to injury, he’s being pulled around on a wooden sled through woods and fields by rabbits. What in the holy hell? I’d start in on the mountain giants next, but at least they made some sort of tiny appearance in the book … actually, that’s stretching it too.

I really would rather not get into the details of every issue I had with the movie, because, for one thing, I’m sure it must have been said by many before me at this point. Secondly, I get that a movie is supposed to be fun and entertaining, that this is all fiction and fantasy; I get all of that. What I don’t get is how anyone would consider this the same caliber of film as any of The Lord of the Rings films, nor how any of the additional scenes were necessary or even beneficial. It only seems to point out that Peter Jackson didn’t like how Tolkien told the story of The Hobbit, so he decided to change it. And then, “screw you, movie-goers! I’m going to make you sit through another SIX HOURS of MY telling of this tale because you love me! And if you don’t, nerd hordes will mob you and sit on you until you pop! And now you can buy even more toys, like the Radagast and Azog action figures! Wuahahaa!”

Yeah, I may have stayed up too late again.

I never thought I’d call a Peter Jackson movie crap, never mind taking the time to do so publicly; but The Hobbit was a complete let down. Though I’d probably hold off on showing my son the movie due to his age anyway, I’d rather he make the decision himself to see it many years from  now on his own, as I just don’t want to ruin the great story we just read a couple years ago by presenting it to him myself. Do you teach a kid that age that it’s OK to take another’s beloved work and modify it to near nonrecognition? That you shit all over another’s work with a white orc with a chopped off arm because it’s cooler looking? It’s certainly not the first time it’s happened, but, for me, it’s the latest, and it disappoints the hell out of me. At least Chuck agreed it wasn’t a great effort.

Do you teach a kid that age that it’s OK to take another’s beloved work and modify it to near nonrecognition?

As for the rest of the Blu-ray, there’s not a whole lot to celebrate, to be honest. Besides the film itself, there’s a special features disc with all of the film’s trailers, as well as all of Jackson’s video blogs he’d done throughout the filming progress. There’s a small featurette about New Zealand and the movie’s locations, as well as some trailers for the different games based on the movie (of which I’m sure there will be even more, with two movies still to come).

This particular Blu-ray, at least, was not 3D, though I admit I did notice some of those “artifacts” some complained about when watching it in the theater, when it was shown in 48 FPS. Some had said some things looked “too real” — or something to that effect. I had forgotten about that complaint until I started watching the Blu-ray, and noticed a few scenes where things just didn’t look quite right. Was it an artifact of the different frame rate, being carried over to Blu-ray, or just a different filming style altogether?

The Blu-ray and DVD releases of The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey arrive in stores this Tuesday.

Photo Credit: New Line Cinema

17 Comments on “The Hobbit comes out on DVD and Blu-ray and pisses me off

  1. Don’t be so bloody naïve… You act as if the only movie in history to be split is The Hobbit, yeah sure, there making more money, you wouldn’t complain in there position, fucking idiot. He fleshed out the story, nothing wrong with giving extra information that links with The Lord of The Rings or indeed The Silmarillion. And don’t complain at the Middle-earth fans, most loyal movie fans ever. Oh and I don’t trust any review that spells Misdle-earth incorrectly (it’s not Middle Earth) so your argument is invalid if you cant even name the location correctly. Well done. You mentioned 48FPS, the most advanced cinematography. EVER. I bet you complained when TV went to colour…

    • My apologies. I’ll make sure to spell it forever more as you said: “Misdle-earth” …

      • Can you please give Scott a lesson on proper use of “their, there and they’re” while you’re correctly misspelling Misdle-earth? Heh

  2. I think this is a disgrace. Tolkien was a masterful writer, as Peter Jackson Is an excellent director. Why would you nor anyone think the book and movie Need be exactly the same? The way to appreciate either is not through expecting Them both to be the same but appreciating that there is more than one way to tell a story.

  3. I agree with your points, Keith, although I don’t feel as vehemently. The movie was Peter Jackson’s story, not Tolkien’s. I personally prefer Tolkien’s version. I enjoy Jackson’s bombastic storytelling – King Kong, for example, which many people considered to be bloated, I absolutely loved for its spectacle. But the pacing of The Hobbit (the movie) was simply too plodding for such a brisk, exciting adventure story. I wanted desperately to love the movie, but the parts I most enjoyed were the ones that felt closest to the book – Bilbo’s encounter with Gollum, for example. The extra padding and the attempts to make Thorin into more of an Aragorn-style character (when Bard is really the “Aragorn” of The Hobbit) actually took me out of the story. During Radagast’s scenes with the rabbit sled, I was actually wondering, “WTF is this?!” I felt embarrassed and actually explained to the people I was with that this was not in the book. Now, I’m not saying that Jackson is always wrong and Tolkien is always right – in Fellowship of the Ring, Jackson made a wise decision to leave out Tom Bombadil. Jackson is, for the most part, an excellent storyteller. His primary mistake was in stretching the story to three movies; the amount of filler necessary to do that screwed up the pacing of the story.

  4. Need to vent?

    SHARE YOUR VIEWS IN THE HOBBIT AUDIENCE SURVEY
    In this survey we are keen to hear people’s thoughts, responses and feelings about The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. We’d like to hear from those who loved the film as well as those who hated it or were critical of some particular aspects of the film’s production. You can participate in this survey here: https://flashq.rcc.ryerson.ca/Hobbit/ Please note that this survey won’t work on Apple iPads, but may work on other tablet devices. A large-screen laptop or desktop computer is ideal. Completing the survey will take around 30 minutes.

  5. How about instead of being sarcastic, you can clearly see he had a honest misspelling, while you have a blatantly incorrect name. Read what he says and don’t pick out that misspelling, he speaks the truth. Oh and by the way, The Hobbit can’t be that bad, 1 billion dollars doesn’t lie. That fact alone disregards your comments.

    • Box Office results do not make a good movie, and thinking that disregards your comments.

      • I beg to differ, why else would so many people watch a movie so many times, for shits and giggles? Think before you speak. There’s a good lad.

          • You didn’t answer my question. They are both good movie series, it’s just a matter of opinion, and you dont sit on the left side of God. It doesn’t matter how many movies you name off that have a high BO taking, they can’t be that bad if they made sheds of money. Money makes the world go round, you’re naïve if you don’t realise that. I’m not even going to reply to your next smart arse comment, 1 billion baby. 1 Billion. Even you, the most totally not one sided movie reviewer ever cannot change that. Here’s a fitting movie quote; tick tick BOOM.

          • I never even said I didn’t like The Hobbit. I just said that just because a movie makes a ton of money doesn’t make it a good movie. I don’t care how many people go and watch a movie, it doesn’t make it good. Some people like to go and watch mind-numbing movies. I’m not saying that’s right or wrong either. I’m just saying, just because a movie makes a ton of money, doesn’t mean it’s a good movie. Neither of us are going to convince the other that their point is right, that’s just the way it is.

            And yes, I do think some people go and watch movies for “shits and giggles”. They just want to go watch what’s hot at the moment. That’s just the day and age we live in. If they don’t go watch what’s popular at the moment, then they would be deemed lacking.

            And the correlation rings true, too. Just because a movie doesn’t make much money doesn’t mean it’s a bad movie, either. That’s another discussion, though.

  6. It took me a LONG while to gather this information, longer than I would like to admit. But the simple answer to this is that Peter Jackson is not adapting The Hobbit at all because The Hobbit was never meant to be Part of the LTOR saga, just adapted to it later. What we are getting is The Quest of Erebor and the short stories in The Unfinished Tales. All of this is being adapted onto the story of The Hobbit mainly because Quest of Erebor is The Hobbit, just with more stuff and adapted to fit into LTOR properly. I received this information from comic artist Dresden Codak’s tumblr blog. I’ll put the link at the bottom. He goes into much more detail about it and the history of the 7 Dark Lords and knows a literal ton. Currently he is breaking down the Silmarillion chapter by chapter. It’s very interesting reading material. And when I posted that comment in the sites review, I was looking for this information but it is like a little piece of hell tiring to find.

    https://dresdencodak.tumblr.com/post/38238171936/where-the-extra-content-in-the-hobbit-came-from

    • Nevermind, found it, you guys should really better tag reviews.

  7. Terrible review. Dreadful writing and logic. Terrific film.

  8. Anyone who watched this crap and thought it good deserves the world they live in. I would give this movie a Triple A rating, But there are so many more A words that I can think of to describe it. Words such as ABOMINATION– ABORTION– ATTROCITY– AGGONIZING

  9. I am sorry you didnt find more enjoyment in the film. I respectfully disagree with some of your reactions. I found the book to be boring compared to the movie. If it took you three days to watch the movie it must have taken you months to read the book. Also in my opinion, the LOTR got better as they went on. So i hope you check this blog again after the next two movies and see if your opinion changes. Although i secretly hope you dont watch the next movies because honestly if you are not captured by the wonder of Bilbo’s adventure you should stop “…now and never come back”

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