After tonight’s conclusion to “Heart of Archness,” there won’t be any more new Archer episodes until 2012. So, in an effort to tide you over, “Heart of Archness: Part III” has everything from someone getting stabbed in the eye to another uncomfortable shot of naked Pam.
It’s also the most hilarious of the three parts. Possibly as a result of that going for broke.
Archer (H. Jon Benjamin), Lana (Aisha Tyler), Ray (Adam Reed), Noah (David Cross) and Rip (Patrick Warburton) are still trapped in the pirates’ dungeon. While everyone else worries about escaping, Archer makes cracks about Dungeness crabs and frets over missing the lacrosse final.
When he does finally start working to get them free, he gets both Lana and Ray shot, the latter needing an emergency blood transfusion, and his ordering Noah to attack Bucky the Pirate gets Rip stabbed in the eye. (Maybe he somewhat deserved it for referring to himself in the third person, but still…)
You could use “Heart of Archness: Part III” — or pretty much any other Archer episode – to make the case that Archer is the most egotistical, ignorant, self-centered and inept person on the planet. He possesses lots of qualities that would make me punch him out (as Lana does) if he were a real person I had to deal with. So why does he remain so watchable?
Possibly because, despite all his faults, in a truly dire situation, he’ll do the right thing in the end — even if it’s not voluntarily or on purpose. See the conclusion of this episode, where he helps get everyone onto the helicopter so they can escape, even if he has to be threatened with the loss of Lana’s friendship to do so. He might be completely insufferable but he’s not irredeemable, just considerably misguided.
One could put some of the blame for that on Malory (Jessica Walter). This week’s flashbacks inform us that she always came to her son’s rescue, never letting him fight his own battles — even when, as a young boy, he tried to hammer a square peg into a round hole. That changes when she decides not to pay the pirates’ ransom after he makes her upset by claiming that Rip finds her unattractive. Malory has never been portrayed as someone who’d win a “Mother of the Year” award, so why should she start now?
Meanwhile, Cyril (Chris Parnell) discovers that during his rage-motivated drunken bender, he drained the ISIS bank accounts and can’t remember a needed password — but we know it’s not such positive phrases as “archersucks” or “killarcherdie.” Pam (Amber Nash) suggests he get drunk again and see if that jogs his memory. Then she ends up naked, again. I’m tempted to bill Adam Reed for the trauma caused by having to see Pam naked twice in two weeks.
He makes up for it, though, by keeping Ray alive. Even if he now boasts both an eyepatch and a wheelchair. I sincerely hope that Ray doesn’t become the next Barry. He deserves better than being consistently injured (and probably eventually killed) by Archer and his ineptitude.
I’ll see you back here in spring 2012. At least that gives me plenty of time to fold all my black turtlenecks.
And I leave you with some quotable Archer…
“Where’s your pride?” — Malory
“In my work.” — Cheryl
“That may be the funniest thing you’ve ever said.” — Malory
“I’ll write another one.” — Noah, about his dissertation
“The world holds its breath.” — Archer
“One of these days, I swear to God, I’m going to burn this place straight down to the ground.” — Malory
“Oh my God, yes! How about this Sunday?” — Cheryl
“Just screw already!” — Noah to Lana and Archer
“And then kill each other. And then shut up.” — Rip