It’s Not Meat, It’s You – I am so done with cutting up chickens

You know, this whole vegetarian thing is has been making me think a lot more about what we eat and why we eat it. It’s funny, because chicken is one of two animals I still eat (the other being fish), because I really do like it. But raw, it has to be one of the most horrifying things in existence.

Once, my sister in law was visiting and we were grilling chickens that she had marinated. She actually dipped her finger into that raw chicken marinade and put it in her mouth. I had to look in the other direction as I was screeching, “Dooooon’t!” She was flabbergasted that I would react that way. “What? I just wanted to see if it had enough salt.”

I recently did something I haven’t done in quite some time — buy whole chickens and cut them up myself. The reason I do this? It’s much cheaper than buying a package of just thighs, drumsticks, etc. The next day, when I went to cut them up though… ugh. Let’s just say, it’s not fun.

I wasn’t always such a wuss about raw meat, but I guess I am now. Like Kona’s boyfriend Luke ripping the membrane off the baby back ribs he was making, I felt a similar wave of disgust and misgiving as I stood at the kitchen counter, cutting through the skin, bone, flesh and tendons of those chickens.

Maybe if it were only that, it wouldn’t be so bad, but the fact is, if you want to cut up a chicken and not mangle it, you have to disjoint the limbs by twisting them in opposite directions before you separate them, which makes a nauseating popping sound, as well as the sensation of the joint itself dislocating in your hands.

I couldn’t help but think to myself, if it were just a dead chicken, with its head and feet still on and its feathers unplucked, would I be able to pop all its joints out of their sockets and cut it up the way I’m doing now? No, I don’t think I could. So, that’s it. I’m giving myself a free pass to be less economical in this one instance (because guys, I am a total cheapskate, and proud of it) and buy pre-cut chicken pieces from now on. After all, I think I’ve earned it from all the money I’ve saved by not eating meat so far.