A Visit from Kevin Reilly (The Night Before Upfronts)

Overheard on a Fox television show set …

“OK everyone, it’s time to call it a wrap for the day and head home to sleep. Now, now, I’ll have none of that complaining! You know if you’re not well rested and performing your best tomorrow, Mr. Reilly won’t leave you something good in your mail slot come morning. Yes, yes, I know the upfronts are in May, but you can never be too careful.

“Oh, come, now … I’ll read you a bit of an age-old poem to help you slip off to sweet dreams. But not too much! We’ll read more each day until Christmas. Now, gather around as I tell you the story of  ‘A Visit from Kevin Reilly’ ….”

‘Twas the night before upfronts, and to the set of House
Came an unexpected visit, by the one Peter Krause
“You think you’re so safe!” warned the unemployed actor
“At FOX no one’s safe, when Kevin Reilly’s a factor!”

The cast and the crew were confused by the warning
Until now they’d felt sure they’d be renewed the next morning
“But why, you are asking, should you listen to me?
“Since Dirty Sexy Money wasn’t on FOX, but ABC?”

Then out from the pocket of the former Darling lawyer
Came an envelope stamped with the seal of their employer
“Well, I do have a list of shows Reilly plans to trash.
“To the highest bidder I’ll give this; you can pay me in cash!”

The words echoed through the studio and through FOX’s back lot
Someone knows what is getting renewed and what’s not!
So from behind every camera, every script and green screen
Scrambled cash-holding casts to bid on what could be seen.

Continued tomorrow …

Clacked by Keith McDuffee
on Dec 19, 2008 @ 12:18 EST5EDT