Just when I thought things couldn’t get any more confusing, new characters are introduced on this week’s Gossip Girl. A bitchy aunt and a secret cousin — ooh la la! Now which one of those newbies is going to be responsible for the Van Der Woodsens’ demise in a few week’s time?
Lily looked really skinny in this episode. Her eyeglasses, grandmotherly as they were, looked like they were weighing down her gaunt-looking face. Are we to presume that she’s lost weight from the stress of turning herself in? Or has she been doing the 30-day Shred?
Lily’s sister Carol (Sheila Kelley) didn’t really add much to the episode, save for me wanting to throw my shoe at the screen. Also? What’s with this photo shoot? And who cares who’s in it and who’s not? I guess I just don’t understand the upper crust.
We all know Serena’s not the brightest, but … why immediately trust someone who’s been ordered to stay away from you and let her live with you? Why give her a family heirloom? Is that necessary? I just really hope Serena’s not going to get screwed over by Charlie (Kaylee DeFer), Juliet-style.
When her cousin asked (with regard to having nowhere to go and nobody left to turn to), “What would Serena Van Der Woodsen do?” I so wanted Serena to say, “She’d have someone fool her into taking drugs and end up in some strange place, not knowing how she got there or if she’d slept with someone.” But wait, what’s that? Serena has no idea that she’s a walking caricature? Oh well.
But that conversation between Carol and Lily at the end of the episode (during which Carol alludes to something hidden and significant in Charlie’s past) makes me think we ought to be on suicide watch. Or stalker watch?
I’m not going to talk about the Raina storyline today, except to say that Nate needs to get the memo that silk robes are apparently the dress code for this episode. Raina — check; Chuck — check; and, across town, the same goes for Blair during her “consumption” period. (Only she could say “I’ve taken to my bed” and make it sound cute, not bratty.)
One more thing … I realize they couldn’t let the Blair and Dan thing happen so easily, but we’re onto you! You’re not off the hook yet … even if Dan is in fact a Labrador.
Xs and Os:
“If I cut everyone out of my life who made a mistake, I wouldn’t have anyone left.” — Serena
“Oh, you are ass-backwards crushing on Blair Waldorf!” — Eric, to Dan
“I know everything has gone wrong since you lost focus on work … but Carmela on Sopranos didn’t get her big break ’til she was 40.” — Dorota, attempting to cheer Blair up
“The Suttons are next … they want to be shot with their English Setters.” — Epperly, discussing the details of a photo shoot with Blair
“[muttering] The Setters are better looking than the Suttons.” — Blair
“Rufus! Yeah — we found leg warmers! … No, I’m not drunk … [looks at Carol] although …” — Lily, answering her phone in a clothing store
“Humphrey more Labrador than toad.” — Dorota
“Does anybody want to be in this picture? Or in this family?” — Lily
Clacked by Rachel Blum-Jose 
on Apr 19, 2011 @ 11:30 EST5EDT
