Quotation Marks: Pop culture references galore!

On Supernatural we took on the “Twihards,” on How I Met Your Mother Barney sang the praises of Axl Rose’s maturing songwriting abilities and South Park took on A&E’s Hoarders and the movie Inception. We also had MSNBC, the Internet, Star Wars and Everybody Loves Raymond getting in on the action. All in all, we were treated to a menagerie of great quotes this week. Enjoy!

Supernatural

“These aren’t vampires. These are douche bags.” – Dean

“Are you wearing glitter?” – Dean
“I only do it to get laid.” – Guy dressed as vamp
“… Does it work?” – Dean
<Nods> – Guy
“I’ll be damned.” – Dean

“Ok, mmmbop your way out of here.” – Dean

Bleep My Day Says

“If we’re not out of here by 5:30, all the good produce will be picked over.” – Ed, trying to rouse the troops to get to the farmer’s market early
“Who’s picking over produce? Owls and crackheads?” – Henry

“You can’t just throw rules out when they’re a pain in the ass.” – Henry to Ed

“I don’t even lick him anymore …. LIKE HIM! LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE HIM!” – Bonnie to Vince, trying to convince him there’s nothing left of a previous affair with an old boyfriend

The Big C

“It’s okay ladies. I’m transgender. It’s a horrible doctor. Don’t ask for his number!” – Sean, while in the ladies’ room

Chuck

“Tell me about the drug you’re gonna use to kill me, hmm … what’s it called? Fakeadeathinol?” – Casey to Chuck

“Don’t you worry about a thing. I am going to eulogize the hell outta you buddy.” – Morgan to Casey

How I Met Your Mother

“ Working together is going to be legen … wait for it … I’ll send you an inter-office memo with the rest because we freaking work together!” – Barney … Only made better moments later when he received a memo with “… dary!”

“I love that guy. Max is both his name, and his level of awesomeness.” – Marshal

“And this theory [new is always better] applies to everything?” – Ted
“Yeah.” – Barney
“So those new Star Wars movies …those are better than the old ones?” – Ted
“Yeah, the first three barely mentioned the intricacies of intergalactic trade law.” – Barney
“So when you’re at a Guns and Roses concert, you’re like ‘yeah yeah Paradise City … whatever, when are they going to rock me some Chinese Democracy?” – Ted
“Axel really has matured as a songwriter, Ted.” – Barney

South Park

“Excuse me, but I am a sheep herder.” – Shepherd
“It’s pronounced ‘hoarder,’ and yes you are.” – Dr. Chinstrap

“Will they be able to wake Mackey up?” – Sharon Marsh
“If they don’t, it will be the end of Europe as we know it.” – Dr. Chinstrap
“Why?” – Sharon
“Because.” – Dr. Chinstrap

“Is this the dream, or the dream within a dream?” – Cobb
“I think it’s the dream inside the Matrix inside the dream!” – Other guy
“Oh well, just keep shooting!” – Cobb

“So he was hoarding because, when he tried to throw things away, his subconscious would remember Woodsie’s voice saying ‘give a hoot, don’t pollute,’ and touching his penis with his wing?” – Firefighter
“Wow! That is so complex and trippy cool!” – Doctor

30 Rock

“You have so many unsolvable problems. like your mouth. It looks like somebody kicked a hole in a bag of flour.” – Jonathan to Liz

“Okay, fine, maybe I’m a little old-fashioned. I’m sorry I’m a real woman and not some oversexed New York nympho like those sluts on Everybody Loves Raymond.” – Liz

Nikita

“I’m naked.” – Owen
“And observant.” – Nikita

“Phase 1: Find them. Phase 2: Kick their ass. Phase 3: Veggie shakes.” – Nikita’s plan on taking down Percy’s guardian staff

Hawaii Five-0

“Yeah, it’s called the internet. People have been doing it since the ’90s.”- Danno (in response to McGarrett’s compliment on his search abilities)

Modern Family

“Oh, this is perfect. Leave it to the gays to raise the only under-achieving Asian in America.” – Mitchell