Texas has been all right for our concheftestants thus far — but in a “shocking” (not really) twist, they all leave their lovely house in the Alamo to head for Dallas, the not quite capital of Texas. It’s the Los Angeles of Texas (that comparison will annoy Texans, I’m sure). Beverly gets confused, thinking Dolly Parton is from Texas. Dolly and Dallas do sound alike after all, so can you blame her?
I really liked the conversations in the car over — dramatically losing weight, talking relationships, gay pride parades, etc. Edward mentioned he was married one year ago — foreshadowing of a new “best day in your life”? Or perhaps… the worst? But when they’re stopped by a Texas state trooper (classic Texas!), Dakota reveals she probably has a warrant out for her arrest in Texas due to unpaid ticket. You sure that was a good idea to reveal on national TV? Just sayin’.
Quickfire was interesting — a great streak this season, with restaurateur John Besh. Chris C thinks Besh is quite the handsome man — first Padma last week, now Besh? The man appreciates human beauty, I suppose. The Quickfire Challenge was to to cook using survival kit style food, dried and packaged, with not many cooking utensils — in just 30 minutes. Seems interesting enough. And finally — something anyone can cook, right? No shallots, no scallops, no dried ice.
I liked how Chris J raced into the corn field to find something usable corn — although he ended up just using corn husk on bottom of his other food. In Edward foreshadowing news, he pulls his back (worst day yet?) — had a great looking soup though. In fact, most everyone’s looked very impressive considering the ridiculous ingredients. Somehow, Lindsay won with a take on a triple club with tuna & sardines in french onion soup with canned Vienna sausages — but the “bread” was saltine crackers! Although I will admit, I’ve made a similar sandwich myself.
Elimination Challenge was a bit “meh.” Merely to cook a course for a “progressive” dinner party. I didn’t know what that was, either: Appetizer in one house, entree in another house, dessert in another. Sort of like those adult “parties” I keep hearing about. It was amusing hearing the restrictions from the various rich peoples: No bell pepper, no cilantro, no cilantro (yes, again), “easy” to eat (whatever that means), spicy (wait, no, not spicy — husband and wife disagreed on that one), bananas, and gummi bears. Sounds tasty.
Edward was great this episode. Hating on Lindsay’s cracker sandwich and the Richie McRichersons gummi bear addiction. Love his jerkish ways. And Paul seems to have a great handle on the challenge — targeting your dishes to the audience and pleasing the wife first. A bit sexist, but it may be accurate in this case. I’m really starting to root for this guy.
There was no obligatory Padma hotness shout-out this episode — I guess it’s up to me? She was wearing a low cut dress that looked fetching. Okay, that’s enough of that. After Chris J serves his edible chicken and collard greens cigars, Tom puts this awful pun in: “Close but no cigar.” That’s terrible, Tom.
In the top four were Grayson with balanced , Sarah with refined , Dakota who used dates for her milkshake cup — loved the idea! And my new buddy Paul. In the end, Paul won with his fried Brussels sprouts with grilled prosciutto and madras spiced veggies. Yes, that’s my guy! But the bottom was Chris G’s overly indulgent cupcake, Ty-Lor’s out of control pork tenderloin, Chuy’s overcooked and mealy salmon, and Chris J’s gimmicky cigars. Saw that coming. Poor authentic Chuy goes home due to his screwed up salmon and goat cheese, off to face Keith in the online Last Chance Kitchen “cook a perfect steak” challenge — Spoiler: Keith loses! Watch for yourself to see why.
And presenting This week’s scallop count: TWO, a dull appetizer from Whitney and a popular one from Beverly.
Clacked by Jeremy Fogelman 
on Dec 01, 2011 @ 11:00 EST5EDT
