Merlin – Kind of epic, maybe kind of gay

That’s this show in a nutshell, isn’t it? Always nodding to fairytales or high fantasy epics, always with the same-sex relationships that make you tilt your head and go “hmm.”

Or they make me do that, at least. Ruby doesn’t always agree with me, but that’s what dialogues are for, right? Unless by “gay” I mean “happy,” in which case Ruby and I are in total accord.

Ruby: This felt like Sleeping-Beauty-meets-Lord-of-the-Rings, what with the whole of Camelot fast asleep (except the princess, ironically) and with all those Nazgul — er, knights of Madea — walking everywhere in slow motion. I can imagine them talking in the hallway. Knight 1: “Man, we so fly walking all slow like this.” Knight 2: “Fo shizzle, ma knizzle.”

Julia: The Nazgul hit all my eighth grade Lord of the Rings dork buttons so hard. I spent pretty much the entire episode pounding on the edge of my laptop stadium chanting, “FELL BEAST! FELL BEAST! FELL BEAST!” Sadly, one never appeared, because no one ever listens to me. If the powers that be on this show listened to me, they’d realize that Merlin and Arthur making out requires a lot less character assassination, that Arthur and Gwen should be adorable old married BFF who marry for political reasons, and  that Lancelot should return and they should all be one big happy family. But noooooo, no one listens to me. Not that I’m, you know, bitter. Not at all.

I mean, the whole “servant in the next life” conversation! The meaningful, sweaty looks of great emotional resonance! The love slapping! And I thought it was super-cute when Arthur went all Florence Nightingale on Merlin after the battle. It reminded me of a lady giving a knight her favor to wear. I will not lie and say I didn’t squeal a little. I totally squealed. Like a little girl.

Ruby: I like how Arthur loses a whole mess of red shirts at Idirsholas, and after wrapping up Merlin’s arm, he just starts back home with a “Darn, now I gotta go get me some more knights.”

Julia: I like how they literally have red shirts, just in case you didn’t get the message clearly enough. That is a job with a really poor survival rate, being a knight of Camelot. I don’t know why Lancelot wanted it so badly. They must offer really awesome health insurance or something. Either that, or riding out with Arthur, even if you’re going to your certain doom, is like the best thing that can ever happen to you.

Ruby: Arthur: “Looks like some darn tourists forgot to put out their campfire!” Merlin, upon noticing row of menacing knights standing directly behind him: “Maybe not.” I have to nominate this as Most Hilarious Moment of the episode.

Julia: See? It’s that old Pendragon intelligence and charm that makes the boys go wild.

Ruby: I loved Arthur and Merlin’s clumsy attempts to look after the king, but I wonder how Anthony Head liked being dragged around like a gigantic prop for most of the episode. Uther appeared to be smiling peacefully as he slept (maybe dreaming about Lady Catrina?) — but I’m betting that was Anthony trying not to laugh. How about that scene where Arthur discovers his father asleep and squeezes Uther’s face while yelling at Merlin, “He is NOT all right!” How did Anthony not crack up? How? I would be dying.

Julia: If you nose around the internet you can find commentary for this episode, and apparently Anthony Head did burst into giggles constantly. (This is not a slight on Anthony Head’s virility — the man giggles. Like a little girl. It’s pretty adorable.) They had to use a lot of stunt Uthers to get through all the scenes. That, and they hid a little skateboard under his cloak to make dragging him easier. Cinema magic!

Also, if you’ve seen any interview after this episode with Katie McGrath and Colin Morgan, she is very put out with him for trying to kill her.

Ruby: Poor Merlin. You could see the struggle in his face. He’s a protector at heart — the opposite of a killer. The only reason he ever kills is to protect someone else. And his first instinct is to protect Morgana; after all, she is just like him. She’s the one person in Camelot who might be able to understand what he’s going through. I wonder if he still would have poisoned her if Uther’s life was the only one at stake. I think he did it because he assumed that everyone in Camelot was in danger; personally, I suspect Morgause only wanted to kill Uther. In any case, what a traumatic decision for Merlin to have to make. You could see the quiet devastation in his eyes and his face, really a complex blend of feelings — pain, reluctance, resignation, sorrow, determination, guilt — emoted beautifully by Colin Morgan.

Julia: I think the entire cast of Merlin is wildly talented and will have great luck in work outside of this show, but if I had a gun to my head and I had to choose who I thought was, say, most likely to win an Oscar? Colin Morgan all the way. He’s absolutely breathtaking in emotional scenes. He’s what really elevates this show to me from a campy little “ooh, pretty fantasy and CGI monsters whee!” children’s show to a show that I feel is totally okay for me, as an adult, to spend hours discussing the characters and dissecting every nuance. Because damn, Colin Morgan does not do half-assed performances. Outside of Merlin, he was apparently getting a bit of a name for himself in the West End for getting cast while he was in acting school doing all sorts of lead roles in plays that were generally pretty dark. And  he’s done two independent films since signing on — one where he’s a cokehead and one where he’s an emotionally and mentally retarded young man who’s been sexually abused by his mother. You’d think, if he takes such serious roles normally, that Merlin would totally be a chance for him to blow off steam and phone it in, but he absolutely doesn’t, and you forget that when Merlin’s falling in horse poo or tripping over himself, but damn, that boy can act his tiny, Irish butt off.

This is not, of course, meant to speak ill of the lovely Katie McGrath, who plays poisoned and betrayed like a champion. Brava, m’lady. I see many Shakespearean tragedies in your future.

Ruby: Now Merlin’s done it. Puff refusing to promise not to attack Camelot … is a pretty good indication that he going to attack Camelot. What is the lesson here? Never swear to do anything on your mother’s life (unless you don’t give a damn about her — then go right ahead).

Julia: Didn’t Merlin have a really botched promise involving the dragon and betrayal and his mother in the last series finale? That boy really never learns, does he?

Clacked by Julia Hass
on Jun 25, 2010 @ 23:00 EST5EDT